By Scarlett Lewis, Chief Movement Officer, Choose Love Movement
Henry Ford, the founder of one of the largest car makers in the world, Ford Automotive said, “The only real mistake is the ones from which we learn nothing.”
We all make mistakes! Mistakes are some of the most important ways we can learn lessons, and grow in our wisdom. I’ve made tons of mistakes in my life, in all the stages I’ve lived through, and am the person I am today because of them. I’m still making mistakes and learning from them.
Here is a list of how we can use the Choose Love Formula to take the lessons we learn into our own lives:
- **Courageous Self-Reflection:**
– Have the courage to get into the Choice Moment, to pause and honestly reflect on mistakes, understanding their root causes and impact. This is also a way to make sure we don’t repeat them.
- **Gratitude for Lessons:**
– Express gratitude for the valuable lessons learned from the mistake, acknowledging personal growth. Gratitude can deflect the pain of mistakes in the form of embarrassment, shame, or blame. Shifting your lens from negative to positive can help build resilience, ensure we learn from the mistake, and enables us to move through them more quickly.
- **Forgiving Yourself:**
– Practice self-forgiveness, recognizing that everyone is prone to errors and that growth comes from forgiveness. In this way we can let go of any bad feelings associated with the mistake and move forward, with lessons learned feeling even more confident.
- **Compassion Towards Others:**
– Approach mistakes with compassion for others involved, understanding their perspectives and emotions, and include yourself in this. Everyone is doing their best with the skills and tools they have at the time. If you knew better, you would do better.
- **Taking Responsibility with Love:**
– Take responsibility for your actions with a sense of love, understanding that accountability is an act of care. When we take responsibility for our actions, we are able to be part of the solutions.
- **Learning from Compassionate Feedback:**
– Seek and welcome feedback with a compassionate mindset, using it as a tool for improvement. When we are harsh in our criticism, it can trigger our fear center, and shut down our prefrontal cortex where logic and reasoning reside. Calm enhances creativity and solution-oriented thinking!
- **Choosing Love Over Perfection:**
– Embrace imperfections with love, realizing that the pursuit of perfection may hinder growth. Noone is perfect. If we start with this understanding we can better enjoy the process and journey of growth.
- **Empathy in Apologies:**
– Apologize with empathy, acknowledging the impact of your actions on others and expressing genuine remorse. It takes courage and confidence to apologize. These are instrumental in healthy relationships, self-esteem, and reducing feelings of shame!
- **Supporting Others in Growth:**
– Offer support and encouragement to others when they make mistakes, fostering a culture of growth. Because we all make mistakes, these can be a powerful connector. When we come together to solve, we are choosing love for ourselves and each other.
- **Courageous Course Correction:**
– Have the courage to course-correct, making necessary adjustments based on lessons learned. Flexibility enables us to adapt to our constantly changing environment.
- **Grateful for Second Chances:**
– Be grateful for the opportunity to rectify mistakes and demonstrate personal growth. Gratitude can help us be available to the new possibilities and opportunities that open up before us after mistakes or struggle.
- **Choosing Love in Decision-Making:**
– Approach future decisions with a mindset of love, choosing actions that align with compassion and understanding. When we choose love over fear, the outcomes look vastly different!
By integrating courage, gratitude, forgiveness, and compassion into your response to mistakes, you not only foster personal growth but also contribute to a more compassionate and understanding environment for yourself and those around you.
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